After orgasm women release a hormone called oxytocin, also known as the “cuddle chemical” that mimics feelings of connection and love. This is why, regardless of their logical thoughts about a person, love is often confused with sex. [1] X Research source
This includes sleeping with close friends, as your existing connection, when mixed with sex, leaves very little separating you from becoming a couple. [2] X Research source
Hooking-up without developing strings is easier if you just want to have some fun and learn more about your sexual needs. Hooking-up because you are lonely, recently heartbroken, or hurting is often a recipe for unwanted attraction, as you try and compensate for your feelings with your new sexual partner.
Long conversations spent getting to know one another, especially on an intimate level (goals, worries/fears, personal history), often lead to love and feelings of attraction. Always wear protection when hooking up with someone. [5] X Research source
Gifts, dates, and sleepovers all lead to more intimate feelings. Focus on what feels good and, once you are happy, leave. [6] X Research source
How do you feel after a hook-up? Do you want to stay around but feel compelled to leave? Do you feel like trying something more permanent? Are you leaving something special because you told yourself you didn’t want a relationship, or because you actually don’t love this person?
“I think I’m ready to look for something more permanent, but this has been fun. " “I’d rather not keep doing this casually. " “I’m ready to see other people now, but I’d love to keep in touch with you. "
“I’ve had my share of relationships, and I am definitely not looking for any commitment right now. " “I’m just here to have fun and meet someone cute. “[9] X Research source
“I am not looking to start a relationship or begin dating. " “I want something casual, not a partner. " “Let’s have something light and fun. "
When you see someone again the next day, be kind and cordial – a hug and hello is not the same as asking for a date. [12] X Research source
Casually bring up funny, light, or interesting stories of other hook-ups to make it clear you are not exclusive. “I’m not looking to be exclusive right now, I hope that’s okay with you?”
Always meet in a public location first. Don’t ever give personal or financial information – your name is more than enough. Drive yourself to and from your meet-up location. Tell a friend or family member your plans to meet someone, your location, and when you plan on returning. [13] X Research source
“This has been fun, but I’d like to look for something a little more serious. " “This has been fun, but I’m not available for anything serious right now, and I’m going to see some other people. " If something is in the early stages, stop making a move or trying to flirt, even if you think it is “harmless. "
