For the forward-facing hug you’ll want to bend so that her head can meet your shoulder, or at least your lower chest.
Fold your arms across her upper back as you would with any hug. Avoid placing them around her neck instead. Keep your head facing forward. Don’t turn it to either side, as you might bump heads or breath in her face once she comes close.
As you get close, move the arm that will be used for the hug (it should be the arm closest to her) out to the side of your body. Begin to position it horizontally in anticipation of the hug. Wait until both of you have sides touching before placing your arm on the girl you’re hugging; keep your arm out to the side instead. One of the strongest advantages of the side hug is avoiding the girl’s head being pushed directly into your waistline or lower, which can be embarrassing for everyone. While the side hug alleviates this issue, you still might consider bending if the girl is still at or below your belt line.
Keep your arm above hers. If your arms criss-cross in the hug, they can tangle and heighten any awkwardness. If you do bend down, it will be best to do so from the knees when in a side hug. Bending at the waist will create a difficult angle for the girl to put her arm around you. Whatever the height difference, the mid-waist and shoulder are really the only acceptable places to rest your arm and hand. You’ll always want to avoid placing your hand(s) at their chest or neck/head. One will end up feeling a bit awkward while the other is uncomfortable.
As the tall one in the hug, don’t rush to remove yourself from the hug to avoid any awkward bumping. First relax your arm and move it away from her body. Let her back up and return to standing before you do the same.
However, there’s always room for some playful honesty in moments like this. It won’t hurt to be upfront and say “Okay, how would you like to do this?”
As suggested, be sure to bend down if hugging from the front or move your arm(s) out when hugging for the side. It’s not a terrible instinct to allow the shorter person to position themselves, but you need to meet them halfway by doing some positioning yourself.
