Ask any questions directly to the disabled person. Some people with disabilities have different body language. For example, it is not uncommon for autistic people to fidget and appear “zoned out” while they listen closely to someone speaking. Don’t assume that someone isn’t listening just because of their body language.
Speak at your normal speed and volume. If they need you to speak up or slow down, they will tell you. Treat them like their real age. Speak to them the same way you’d speak to their same-age peers. For example, a singsong voice and baby talk are not appropriate for addressing disabled teens and adults. Match your vocabulary usage to theirs. Many people with disabilities have average vocabularies. However, if the person only speaks with simple words, then you can also speak more plainly. Never mimic their disability accent. It won’t make them understand you better, but it may make them think that you are trying to make fun of them.
If they seem to be struggling with something, ask “Do you need help?” or “Would you like me to _____?” Then listen to their answer. Sometimes they’ll say no because they want to try it on their own, or they don’t really need help. If they look puzzled, ask if they’re confused about something. Don’t worry too much about it. While you may not have much experience with disability, they have lived with it for a long time, and they know their own needs pretty well. They can tell you if there is a problem.
Many of these are available online. For some people, the use of symbols, photographs, or stickers will be easier. These could be presented to show what is happening that day, to illustrate their calendar, to communicate, make choices at mealtime, etc.
Use technology to help you. In some cases, electronic devices and specially designed computer software are more suitable options. These can enable a person with a learning disability or developmental disability (intellectual disability) who can’t use verbal communication, and can promote their independence. You might even make use of smartphone apps to help you interact with ease. Never interact with them as you would interact with a toddler. Though their intellectual disability may make you feel like you need to baby them, doing so could make them depressed or even hateful towards you. Try not to acknowledge that they have a disability, but don’t ignore them if they need help. However, if their disability makes something difficult for them, never just do it for them, unless they ask you to. Instead, give some pointers on how they can do it better.
